New Series: Interview with Converts
Jack and Tonya Hembree share their story of conversion to the Catholic faith and their outlook on the Church today.
This article is part of a series in which we interview recent converts to the Catholic faith. As a part of the ongoing synod process, the church encourages us to listen to persons or groups that we may not be hearing, for whatever reason. The Catholic Church in the United States has been living through a collapse in attendance, belief, and regular practice for many years now. So we think it could be enlightening to focus our attention on persons who, when everyone else is leaving, have decided to join the Church (sometimes at great personal cost).
How can listening to individuals God has led into the Church help us to understand God’s will for our Church today? Let’s find out together.
Please introduce yourself to our readers - where are you from, what is your career, and what is your state in life?
Thank you for giving us the opportunity to share though our journey isn't much different from anyone else's. We are Jack and Tonya Hembree, converts from the reformed perspective who entered the church in 2017. Jack is currently the Director at Healthpoint Fitness Center with Southeast Health. I am currently homemaker, and partially retired homeschooling mom of 6, the youngest 3 of whom are triplets are still at home though they are almost 21 now. The middle triplet, John, due to the repair of a heart defect, ended up with severe cerebral palsy just after birth.
What was your religious background before entering the Catholic Church?
Jack was raised as a Baptist in Louisiana though he and his twin brother were sent to Catholic school until about the 5th or 6th grade. I grew up a few hours north of him without any church affiliation. In 1988, soon after we were married, Jack led us into a local Baptist church that was close to our home. We were newly "saved" as they called it and as was the norm back then in the protestant churches, we soon found ourselves in Sunday school teacher positions. That has given us lots of cringe moments to deal with over the years. We grew weary of the emotional manipulation through pride and theologically empty sermons and the endless programs that were thrust upon us designed to use guilt to get more bodies in the pews. With a few close friends, we began to study together on our own each week and it is no surprise that without a magisterium or any real tradition to lean on and an alarmingly unhealthy portion of belief in our own ability to discern truth, we ended up heading down the reformed Calvinist path in our thinking. Years later, after moving to Nashville, TN, we joined a conservative PCA Presbyterian church just north of the city. A memory stands out from those days. One day after church when our triplets were tiny, about 3 or so, we overheard them talking about God who was up there in front of us during church. We realized they thought our pastor was God! We were, after all, standing, facing him and singing songs to "him" they thought. You face the one you are singing to and worshiping right? We had no idea that memory would be so important later on. We kept these things in our thoughts and began looking for a "high church" liturgy. One that elevated God above man rather than having man at its center. Then we moved to Cape Girardeau.
How did you first discover or encounter the Catholic faith and what was your reaction to Catholicism at that moment?
There were no conservative PCA Presbyterian churches here and for the first time in our marriage, we couldn't settle on a church to go to. We prayed and visited around for a year or so, then one day Jack jokingly mentioned we should go to the Catholic church. (Spoiler, he wasn't joking) We visited a local Catholic Church here in town. My first reaction to the visit was that it seemed kind of like the Lutheran churches we had visited with a few exceptions. I will never forget the shock in the eyes of the poor woman at my back who at the sign of peace didn't know what to do with the "How are you?" that left my lips. After all, that is what we did at every protestant church we had ever attended. One interesting thing we noticed was that there was no talking before the Mass. No priests running around shaking hands and schmoozing everyone. No kids jumping pews and behaving terribly. There was just a quiet, peaceful silence that was startling and uplifting. The priest came in during the procession and was completely focused on the front. There was a homily that lasted 5 minutes and it was anything but theologically deep and mind-tickling. I think God wanted us to realize that we needed to look for Him. Not for knowledge, not for the other people, not for pride, just Him. He was there humbly waiting for us to see Him through the prideful fogged-up lenses we were wearing. The Mass wasn't about us, it was all about Him and His sacrifice for us.
What first prompted you to investigate the Catholic Church and her teachings in a more serious way?
The thing that prompted us to investigate the Church more seriously, was the falling away of the idol of sola scriptura. The idea that the Bible alone is the only authority needed for correct belief. During a porch visit with the Jehovah's Witnesses, I realized something that a cradle Catholic has known from the beginning, the Bible itself is not enough to answer the multitude of nuances and questions that arise in theological discussions. At least not definitively. In fact, 1 Timothy 3:15, seems to say the pillar and ground of truth is the church, not the Bible, as we had been taught. So then the next question for a protestant becomes, "What church?" There are many churches out there using the same scriptures and many sincere people who believe they are right in their interpretation. We could look up what R.C. Sproul and John Calvin said, but who were these men? They were just men who lined up with our belief system. They had zero authority and no way for us to truly know if they were correct. This began an honest search to try to discover what the Catholic church actually taught about its own doctrines and about Peter and the papacy. Scriptures that come to mind are Isaiah 22:20-22, and Matthew 16:18 ff. John 21:15. We discovered the writings of the early church from men like Irenaeus, Eusebius, and the Didache. The early church certainly didn't sound protestant. Like so many converts before us, we read Rome Sweet Home by Scott Hahn. I ran across it at a library book sale and couldn't put it down. His thoughts resonated with us so well since we had the same background understanding of theology. It set off a frenzy of further reading and listening to everything we could find from an orthodox Catholic perspective. After about a year and a half, wild horses couldn't drag us away and we entered RCIA.
Was there a particular element of Catholic belief or practice that you found difficult to accept?
In the beginning, we had some of the usual misunderstandings that protestants have. Strangely enough, we had issues with papal infallibility. We wanted the certainty of magisterial authority but didn't understand the limits of the checks and balances the church had instituted. I think coming to an understanding that the church isn't saying that the Pope is an oracle who runs around spouting infallible things on airplanes, or anywhere else for that matter, helped greatly.
The prayers to Mary were also difficult for me. As a protestant, we believed that prayer was always worship. After all, what else did we have aside from prayer and hymns for worship since there was no sacrifice? Learning that prayer just means petition and can be used to worship but isn't always worship was helpful for me. I now know that prayer to Mary or the saints is similar to asking my close friends to pray for me.
What elements of the Catholic faith did you find attractive or interesting?
One of the elements we find attractive now that we have been in the church for a few years is the reverence given to God in the Mass which is beautiful and fitting for our Holy God and His sacrifice for us. Heavenly things need to be veiled in silence and beauty sometimes and with words that the head may not understand but your heart does. This can be seen at a very reverent Novus Ordo Mass and most especially during the Traditional Latin Mass. We had the chance to attend a Traditional Latin Mass up in St. Louis very early on in the journey. It was absolutely the most other-worldly, heavenly yet fearsome experience I believe we can have on earth. You know without a doubt by all your senses that what is happening on that altar is something too sacred to see up close, too sacred to hear every word, and too sacred to hold in your hand. (See Baruch 6:28) I find that I need all the "smells and bells" to actively participate at the Mass as they say, and not just be in attendance.
Who were the Catholics who helped you on your journey and what did they do for you?
The Catholics who helped us along the journey were both of our sponsors of course, and Father Saunders and Father Kelly who were both at St. Mary's at that time. The leaders involved with RCIA were very helpful and encouraging. There were so many kind people who prayed for us I wish I could list them all. We are eternally grateful for their prayers and support.
What were the first few years as a Catholic like for you?
The first year or so was both exciting and hard. Our old pastor from the Nashville area contacted us several times through letters and sending us books asking us not to continue down the path. We received several letters from old friends at that church trying to understand why we were leaving our reformed beliefs. It was an amazing learning curve. Actually, it still is and it is always humbling! Since we went to secular school for most of our schooling, we knew very little about Catholic history from a Catholic perspective. It's been a joyful journey overall.
What is your place in the Church now - are you involved in particular ways in your parish or some personal apostolate?
Jack is a sweet husband and usually takes care of John for me so I can sing in the local Gregorian chant schola. We occasionally get to sing at St. Mary's here in Cape Girardeau and usually the first Sunday of the month at the Newman Center chapel at Southeast Missouri State University. What a beautiful tradition the church has in its treasury of sacred music. There is so much to draw from that is theologically rich and fitting for the worship of an Almighty God.
As a convert, someone who has intentionally joined the church at a time when many are leaving the Church, what is your perspective on the ‘status quo’ in our parishes and communities?
From our perspective the local church, while not visibly perfect yet here on earth, is still as close to heaven as we will get while here. Even with all the problems in the church we feel incredibly blessed to have the privilege of becoming Catholic. Being Catholic is more than just what church we attend. It is something that takes place in your soul. You become part of a family that is approximately 2000 years old. Thankfully, we happen to be at a fairly traditional parish with good and holy priests. With the protestant trend of tossing away tradition that is still happening in our churches, we are deeply concerned about where the church is headed. Jesus asked us through the apostle John, while he was on the cross, to take care of His mother. St. Cyprian, a bishop in the 3rd century famously said, "No one can have God as Father who does not have the church as Mother.” We believe that God has put all of us here for this time. May we all pray diligently for our bishops and priests and each other and may God raise up strong men everywhere who will educate the people, and defend her in her time of need.
What should we stop doing that you think is hurting our efforts of evangelization?
The watering down of the Catholic identity and a lack of reverence for all things holy hurts the evangelization efforts, especially in protestant America. A convert that truly converts doesn't want to be reminded of his error and compromises. We see this when a church sings protestant hymns during the Mass. Things creeping into the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass that shouldn't be there like announcements being read before the Mass has officially ended. When the people no longer bow their heads when the name of Jesus is spoken. When we don't genuflect as the crucifix passes us. When we don't genuflect during the creed when the words of the incarnation are mentioned. When we don't genuflect in front of the Tabernacle as we change sides in the church. And most importantly, when we can't receive the Eucharist on our knees because a kneeler isn't provided for the older population. These are a small taste of the reverence and identity we have lost. If we are trying to become like the protestant mega church on the corner, we won't be able to compete with that. There will always be a better program or a more exciting reindeer game down the street.
What should we start doing that you think would empower our efforts of evangelization?
Jesus says in John 12:32 that when we lift Him up, He will draw all men unto Himself. A lack of programs isn't the problem but a lack of belief, at least according to the latest Pew poll. Only 31% of Catholics believe that after the consecration the host and the wine truly become the Body and Blood of our Lord veiled under the appearances of bread and wine. In our opinion, we believe the place to begin is restoring many of the ancient customs and practices in the liturgy, like the Latin language, beautiful vestments, more silence, chanting the antiphons, and the ad orientem posture with priests and people facing the same direction. These things certainly can't hurt, they were handed down to us by the saints, and may help in returning reverence of God to our worship and, hopefully, stave off a further decline in belief in the Real Presence. Without true belief there will be no true evangelization. These kinds of practices also go a long way toward the catechesis of the congregation, especially our children.
What would you say to someone thinking of joining the church today? What would you say to someone thinking of leaving the church today?
To someone thinking of joining the church we would say without reservation, hurry, don't delay! To someone considering leaving, we would have to ask, "to whom will you go?" Only Jesus has the words of eternal life. If it is scandal pulling you away, know that there is scandal anywhere you find human beings. You can't escape it. Don't abandon Jesus. Stand with your Mother!
This is a wonderful testimony. I was a fallen away Catholic who passed through Protestantism on my way back to the Church. Everything said here makes so much sense! Thank you Jack and Tonya <3
Thank you, Jack and Tonya for sharing your story!